A male friend

During the past few months away from my blog I did a series of courses, My chinese course, I am now on Level 3, My boyfriend says I am now as good as a senior infants child. basically a kid who is in their second year of primary school.

My French friend from class said my boyfriend has a great way of complementing people lol. But I took it on board as a good thing. Anyway other than that friend the rest of the people in my Chinese class are much older than me.

But asides from that course I also did a CV and interview skills course and that course had more people my own age, including one guy who went to school with one of my old friends and at the beginning of the course I talked about my boyfriend and how I was learning Chinese.

But at the end of the course this guy Johnathon, asked me for my phone number and I was a bit surprised to say the least but didn't see any harm in it. I come against this situation so often, people sometimes men or women asking me for my phone number and i don't particularly want them to have my phone number. What can i do or say? sorry I don't have a mobile, sorry i don't think its appropriate for you to have my phone number? Then I just seem like a big bitch. 

But within a few days he was texting me and asking do I want to meet up blah blah.  out of politeness and thinking theres no harm, I met him in dun laoighraire, and it was going fine, we were having a nce chat, then he started trying to pay for things for me and then alarm bells started ringing and I had to get out of there. Then we ended the meet up with a hand shake which was a bit weird, Then after that day I started avoiding him as if he had the plague.

Then I was at my families house on Friday chatting to my mom and told her about what happened and my mom said Sarah you have to be more careful, A man and a woman can never remain just friends ever. To me this statement seems terribly old fashioned. I mean its the 21st century surely a man and a woman can stay just friends if they want. 

I don't often talk about Africans in my blog but recently I was talking to one of my african male friends. The topic of female friends came up and he said no matter whether a woman is married, single, separated, divorced. If a male and a female are in a house together alone something is going to happen. He personally doesn't allow his girlfriend to have any of his friends numbers, in case there is temptation. In particular African male friends. I really thought this was too extreme.  (By the way we weren't alone lol)

My boyfriend doesn't mind me having his friends numbers because he knows nothing would ever happen with them but he hates other strange men he doesn't know having my number. Its funny how different cultures see things. 

What a coincidence!

Next Sunday will be me and Michael's commitment anniversary. I guess it sounds weird but I don't know what else to call it. But anyway we have chosen a theme for our gifts to each other, I know how organised are we. We chose "Paper" which is kind of a coincidence since I have just recconnected with my old love of snail mail and penpalling.

Actually I have been having a number of coincidences lately. On Wednesday, I met my friend Guo Zhi Bai in Dublin city centre and I hardly ever get to see him because he is so busy with his life and his job and his studies and his badminton and everything else, you name it, he's probably busy with it. So we finally arranged to meet up on Wednesday and we headed to Super Mac's had a nice chat then off we went to the cinema.

We bought our tickets to see "Crazy Stupid love" When I was in the bathroom I checked my phone. My former classmate had text me and thrust me, he had been keeping quiet for the last 6 weeks, I had no idea where he was or what he was doing. He's another one of the busy sorts.

He text me to say "what a coincidence, I saw you with that basketball boy" him and Guo Zhi Bai don't get a long. Naturally I was shocked and was thinking how did he see me, but I didn't see him, My eyesight isn't that bad... right. I tried calling him no answer so I left it.

But the other weird thing at the cinema is we bought Diet 7UP in Spar rather than in the cinema to save money, I know were stingy students.

When I sat down I put my Diet 7Up in the drink holder beside me the lights went off and by accident i hit my bottle, I heard it land on the floor, I used my phone as a torch light to try and find it, because there's no way it could have gone far, but no luck.

So after the movie when the lights came on me and Guo Zhi Bai searched again and still couldn't find it. It was weird maybe the 7UP fairies stole it. Or maybe this was a punishment inflicted by the cinema owners for being stingy.

One simple request

I have known several Chinese men during the last 3 years, ranging from the incredibly rude, generous, caring, spontaneous, crazy, show offs, etc. But in all my time I have never had such a strange request or more like an order... Last night i was having a nice cosy time with my boyfriend and we were rather loved up. Then he said he wanted to play some games on my phone.... I knew he wanted to read my messages.. ugh i really hate this. I just find it such an intrusion thats private. Its not like i can check his messages and have some fun because he never sends texts anyway except to people from his work, how boring is that? The rest of the time he just calls his friends and speaks in Chinese. So its no fun to play with his phone... In actual fact he wasn't the only man who wanted to check my messages that day.... but thats another story... both times i refused.... and i deleted all my messages. actually by accident but it was a happy accident lol!

Actually my fear of getting my messages checked stems back from when i was a kid, My dad used to have a rule that nobody can check his messages, because they are private.... I was just a kid and was pretty nosey and curious.... and his phone was lying around... and i read his messages several times.... and discovered he was having an affair on my mom. definitely without a doubt. I continued to read his messages for several weeks and then i stoped because i didn't know what to do. I never told my mom and i never said anything to my dad i just kept the secret and often when i was furious with my dad i would cry angry with rage. but i never said anything I felt it was my own fault i should never of checked his messages... I think that whole cheating scenario really had a bad impact on me.. Even now i still have a huge desire and cravingv for new things. new people.  obviously i wouldn't cheat on my boyfriend, but i do enjoy company of new people alot and of other people who i don 't see very often...

Anyway back to the request i got last night "Can i use your phone for 10 days?" Initially i thought it was a joke? I said no, no way. Thats mine why should i give it to him besides i had barely even had the phone 10 days! In fact yesterday was me and my phones 10 days anniversary together lol. Then he got so angry and sulky, eventually i siad fine take it. Just to stop him sulking and then he siad no I don't want it i was just testing you and he said he couldn't believe i was so obsessed with money. He told me that if he had a Chinese girlfriend and asked her could he use her phone for 10 days. she would say of course take it for as long as you want... and she would be happy about it? Then he said so this is irish. you are so ugly. Then he went to sleep. I was left lying there wondering what is so bad about me not letting him have my phone. 

Here is my phone, The Samsung Galaxy Europa

I really don't think it was a money thing, Although his phone is not as good as mine i just couldn't understand why should i give him my phone its mine. i feel a personal attachment to all my phones.

Is this an Irish mentality that we don't share?

Do we always have to get something of equal worth.